Leave The Pregnant Woman Alone!

Week 13

At 13 weeks and 5 days, I‘m stressed to the max, leaving me in a foul mood. The pregnancy hormones seem to be kicking in finally. I’m either calm and perfectly stable or flying off the handle, pissed off because there are some people trying to dictate how I should be living my life.

Normally this wouldn’t bother me because I’m really good at flashing the middle finger and ignoring comments, however, it’s coming to me all at once and I’m severely overwhelmed. It’s not just the unsolicited advice and demeaning comments, but the tension of all the responsibilities this pregnancy is bringing upon me. It’s like a ton of bricks have been dumped upon my shoulders and I can’t seem to find a place to discard them.

Last Saturday Dave and I went to his parent’s house to give them the news about the pregnancy and us moving in together. It went pretty well, but we had to explain why we’re not getting married. We saw them again on Monday and had to do the same thing again. Actually, it was me doing most of the talking and by the end of the night I think I finally got them to understand our position.

All week long I’ve had to deal with some people using scare tactics in effort to change some of my habits. I’m only drinking 1 to 1 ½ cups of light, diluted coffee a day and that’s the only caffeine I put into my body. My doctor told me I can have up to 3 normal sized cups and I’m not even doing that. To hear people say that I can’t have any or else I’ll miscarry and that they don’t care what my doctor says pisses me off! I’m embarking on my second trimester and still with child so if you’re not a physician, shut the hell up! I’m not going to live in fear. Stress is detrimental to me and my unborn child so please, mind your own business and leave the pregnant woman alone!

Oh yeah, and the smoking. That’s always a controversial subject since smoking is not good for our bodies and unborn children. I know this and carry it with me every day. The minute I realized I was pregnant, the first thought I had was, “Holy shit! How am I going to quit smoking after 15 years?“ I have to say that when I’m left alone, it’s so much easier for me to continue cutting down my intake, but when I’m hounded constantly, all I do is smoke more. Reading an email from a friend telling me that I’m basically “scum of the Earth” because I can’t quit cold turkey is disheartening and sabotaging my efforts to change. I don’t need that shit right now. I’m trying to kick my nicotine addiction. Is a little support too much to ask for?

Pregnancy Symptoms This Week:

* Stretchy cramps
* Fatigue
* Exaggerated stress
* Hormonal outbursts
* Fluttering in my uterus
* Fairly frequent urination
* Mild itchy skin

My prenatal vitamins must be kicking in because I’m finding hair in unwanted places, ICK! I feel like I’m due for a good waxing. I’m a little pissed though. I thought prenatal vitamins were supposed to strengthen my nails, but they’re breaking easily instead. Also, I’ve hit my laziness limit. All I can think about is cleaning and clearing the extra clutter out of my apartment.

Sorry about the extra long rant. I have to write it out in order to free my Spirit of all the unnecessary negativity. Since I wrote the majority of this blog yesterday, I’ve had some time to relax and try to find solutions to my stress. Today I decided to rid myself of the crap I can’t control and put the responsibility on the person it actually belongs to. I feel better already!

xoxo,
Cristin

Welcome To Poochville

Week 12

I’ve made it to 12 ½ weeks without turning psycho bitch on anyone! I really thought that pregnancy would unleash the monster within, but Dave tells me otherwise. Nice. I’m only getting emotional when someone pisses me off to the point where I can’t hold it in any longer. When I’m on the PMS, I turn into a different person so it’s great to see that pregnancy is making me react less hormonal and sweet. You’d think this would make me want to be pregnant all the time…LOL!

Pregnancy symptoms this week:

* Light heartburn
* A touch of insomnia
* Headaches (new)
* Fatigue and laziness
* Stretchy cramps

Symptoms that are subsiding:

* Frequent urination
* Needing to eat every hour
* Gas
* Painful boobies (for now)
* Pinching nerves

This week I’ve officially entered Poochville. I used to say that I’m bloated, but now I’m starting to take the pregnant woman shape. I’m feeling like I have to be careful of what I eat because I started this pregnancy a little fatter than I would’ve liked. My tummy wouldn’t be this blown out at 12 weeks if I were at my normal size. It doesn’t matter what I eat though, the minute I do my stomach pooches out and I feel like a heffer. I weighed myself this morning and I’ve gained 5 pounds. That’s not too bad, right?

I went to the Motherhood store with Dave last night to check out prices and maybe get a new pair of maternity jeans. The ones I bought a couple of weeks ago are okay, but I wanted something cuter. I was surprised at how cheap the clothes were as I’ve always thought they were off the chain expensive. I also got a new shirt. What made me laugh was the pregnancy pillow you can try on with the clothes. I told Dave that if I look like this in 3 months, our kid would be an alien baby since the pillow was all lumpy and deformed.

What really excited me was the fact that my ass isn’t as big as I thought. I fit into petite mediums. Whooo hoooo! Unfortunately I’ll be wearing large and extra large shirts because my boobs are the size of watermelons and I highly doubt they‘ll be deflating any time soon. Perhaps that’s where a portion of my weight lies. I’m telling you, each breast has got to be about 5 pounds a piece, at least!

My next OB appointment is February 5th and I'll be about 15 weeks along. It's just a check up and they'll probably do more tests, ugh. I really hate needles, but I'm dealing with it better than I thought.

See y'all next week!

Attack of the Crotch Cam

Week 11

I went to my OB appointment today and what do you know? I got served the crotch cam again. I knew by the look on my midwife’s face that I had it coming and not in the hot and sexy way. Dave was ooh-ing and ahh-ing at the damn monitor again. Keep in mind, this was before I got served, lol.

Dave and I were able to see the baby flailing its arms and legs. It’s like he knew he was being watched and was screeching, “What the hell do you think you’re doing?!? Get that thing outta here!” Okay, so that’s what I was thinking. Perhaps it was just trying to show off for us, who knows. We did hear the heartbeat and it was going at 165 bpm. I uploaded a new pic of the ‘lil swimmer to my slideshow. Take a look if you‘d like. It’s amazing that in just 3 weeks it went from a tadpole to an alien getting ready to turn human.

I’m now suffering from crotch cam cramps, but that should go away within a few hours. The fatigue isn’t as bad as it was in previous weeks, but the laziness is kicking in though. I feel bad because I’ve made Dave my little bitch for the last couple of weeks. God bless him, he’s really stepping up to the plate to make sure I’m comfortable. He’s rubbing my back and feet, taking out the garbage, cleaning the kitty litter and helping me clean my place. It’s high time I get off my ass and do it myself though.

I’m hearing that the other pregnant ladies around me are suffering from morning/noon/night sickness. I’m so grateful that’s not me. I have my next appointment Feb. 5th and that's just check-up stuff. We find out the sex of the baby on March 13th, if they can tell. I’ll be about 20 weeks then. I’m getting ticked that I don’t have any intuitive hits that stick about the sex. My psychic friends are changing their answers so I’m a bit confused. We’ll just have to wait and see, I guess.

God and His Middle Finger

Anyone who has been around me in the last 10 years knows that I have been very against the “white picket fence” lifestyle. That would be the whole getting married, having babies and living happily ever after deal. I must have said NEVER a million times! So when I met Dave back in March at a wedding, naturally I brushed him off with a “hell no!” when I found out he was younger, divorced with 2 kids.

I couldn’t get him to leave me alone, but I couldn’t stop picking up the phone either and eventually we were in a full blown relationship. I integrated myself in his kids’ lives, drama and all. Every time I tried to sabotage the relationship, God would come down, shove his middle finger in my face as if to say, “Hey dumbass, this guy is fantastic. What do you think you’re doing, you fool!”

Fast forwarding some months later, I took him to Michigan to meet some friends and my family. We came back to Ohio to find out that God had put the smack down on me yet again. I missed my period and my pregnancy test came back positive. I was shocked, of course. I couldn’t believe it was even possible since I was on my period and used condoms with spermacide, but lo and behold, a baby is on the way. I feel like I haven’t had any control over the happenings in this relationship since day one. I know that’s not really true, but it feels that way.

WEEKS 5-6
I found out I was pregnant and it took me about 24 hours for me to “get it”. I finally accepted it and went with my friend Nikki to get my confirmation. I was told I was 5 weeks.

The minor abdominal cramping began and I started having daily bouts of bleeding. I freaked out and called my doctor to move my appointment up a week. I had my first OB appointment on December 10th. They served me up to a crotch cam and everything was fine. I saw this thing in my uterus that looked like a worm with a heart beat and I cried like a baby. I was told I was approaching 6 weeks. It measured 0.46cm.


WEEK 7-
Still bleeding, but this week I passed every bloody color of the rainbow coupled with strange mucus blobs. When I saw a blood clot, I made another appointment. This time I had a male doctor who gave me the CC (crotch cam) again and everything appeared to be normal. Here I am having my cervix scraped and all Dave did was stare longingly at the 20 inch LCD monitor, with stars in his eyes. He's such a typical male, I tell ya.

I was informed that nothing was to be put up in the vagina (no tampons or sex). Now why would a pregnant woman use a tampon? I wasn’t bleeding THAT bad, lol. You should’ve seen Dave’s face when he heard “no intercourse for 2 weeks”. Poor guy! I didn’t have a problem with that because I feel like the baby has sealed off my vagina anyway.

I’m getting sick of doctors asking me if I feel pregnant. All I feel is extended PMS symptoms because it’s too soon for baby action at this point. The Dr. told me I was 7.6 weeks, which I felt was more accurate. This time, the little worm has transformed into a tadpole, clearly showing its head, hands and feet, measuring 1.46 cm. I didn’t see a heartbeat and asked the Dr. to show it to me. He did and my little one was beating at 150. I'm due 7/29/08. Yay, now I can relax.


WEEK 8-
I went to Michigan to visit friends and family. Before I got there, one of my best friends Dawn told me that she was late. She took a pregnancy test and it came back positive!! She’ll be due approximately 4 weeks after me and I’m so excited. It’s too bad she’s in MI and I’m in OH, but we’ll be pregnant together.

The bleeding finally subsided. I’m tired, my boobs are the size of cantaloupes, I’m bloated big time, eating every hour and peeing every 20-30 minutes. Ugh. Taking 3 ½ hour naps in the middle of the day messed up my work schedule. It’s slow enough during the holidays and I’m getting frustrated.

Dave and I talked about names for the baby. He expressed his desire to not be left out of the decisions, which I understand, but I’m stuck on my own names. I’ve asked him for some, but he hasn’t been able to come up with any yet. I wasn’t sure I wanted to give the baby Dave’s last name and not mine, however, he suggested we hyphenate it (Lentine-Andrus). I didn’t even have to prompt him.

He also told me that ideally he’d like to get married, but doesn’t want to take my independence away since it’s so important to me. So here it is, God’s middle finger being shoved in my face and I feel like an asshole…again!

I’ve cut down my smoking from 2 packs a day to under a pack. I am not able to quit right now, but the ciggs are starting to taste bad. I’m hoping that I’ll be able to stop eventually on my own. I’m being realistic about it though.

WEEK 9-
I'm getting over a cold. I'm allowed to take Tylenol products and it seems to be working fabulously. I had to buy my first pair of maternity jeans, size 10. Thank God because this bloating is massive and normal jeans aren’t comfortable. I’m hoping I can get about 4 more months out of them. My friends laugh when I tell them I’m bloated. They say, “You’re not bloated, you’re pregnant!” Really? I wasn’t aware of that fact, lol.

I’m feeling really guilty that I can’t play with Dave’s kids like I used to. My mom had a miscarriage after picking me up and lifting me over her head, so I’m trying to refrain from carrying Halle all the time. She’s actually heavier than Trenity, if you can believe that. I’m telling them that I have a bad back, until I can no longer hide the pregnancy and we can tell them the truth.

Still no bleeding, woo hoo!

WEEK 10-
I told Dave that if he’s not careful, I’ll fart him right out of the apartment. The flatulence is terrible. I’m waking up anywhere from 4:30 to 7am with gas pains so strong I feel like I’m having a miscarriage. The bathroom is becoming the second most used room in my place these days. Once I’m awake in the morning, I can’t go back to sleep.

Now I’m getting consistent heartburn. It’s relatively mild, but still annoying. I‘m experiencing more light, stretchy cramps. I wish my PMS symptoms would be as lovely as this pregnancy. Why I suffered so much then and not now is beyond me. I think it’s BS. Being laid up and tired has been inconsistent this week, allowing me to work more and I’m very happy about that.

My dreams have turned psychotically weird. I know that’s nuts coming from me of all people, but dreaming about murder and ice cream parlors the size of amusement parks next to Taco Bell is just insane, lol. I’ve had 3 hints of having a girl in my dreams, but I’m still longing for a boy. I won’t find out until 20 weeks, but I’m finally starting to accept that having a girl is a real possibility.

No more bleeding. I don't understand why I was so different than my mom and Laura. I'm just grateful it's over. I haven't gained a single pound yet, but I'm sure that will change once I start my second trimester. I guess that'll be my birthday gift. 29 years old, knocked up and fat. Nice.

So now we’re up to date. I have my next OB appointment on Tuesday, Jan. 8th and I’m having another ultrasound. No CC, thank God! Those are terribly uncomfortable, even with the jelly lube. I’m hoping to hear the baby’s heartbeat this time with the Doppler.